toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
now i know why i became what i already was.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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