She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
