quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
