i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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