actually, I'm a sock model
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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