Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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