i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
