Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
