Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
