i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
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