It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
she peed on how many people?
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
