Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
