Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
