ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
