So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
