Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
