I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
