My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
