dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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