that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
