"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
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