I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
