She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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