nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Randomize
