Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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