so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
