I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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