i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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