dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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