so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
