She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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