And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
