Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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