16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
