I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i think my mom watched the whole time
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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