Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
