My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
