Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
