Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
