After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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