So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
