I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Randomize
