oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
the condom got lost in my hair
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
