Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
