This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
We don't watch enough power rangers
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
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