We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We're not piercing ourselves today.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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