I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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