he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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