umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
