Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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