I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
areolas are like halos for boobs.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I am available for nakedness
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
