then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
i need some magic done to my vagina
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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