yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Randomize
